Tipula Paludosa Joke

A further unusual manifestation is the abundance of 'daddy long-legs' (or crane fly or Tipula paludosa even!) that aimlessly coast into windowpanes, they can’t really fly, they just hover about, nonchalantly engaging in an aloof stance, seemingly possessing no sense of direction whatsoever. Are they on a gap year? I find their presence quite disconcerting, especially when partaking in a spot of indoor pole-vaulting perchance. So, last night, I could put up with them no more and decided to eradicate a whole bunch of these annoying creatures. The vacuum cleaner seemed the most perfect weapon to deploy. There I was stealthily stalking around the house with the Dyson at full power, searching for crane flies. I had decided that there would be a total zero tolerance policy with regard to these uninvited pests. None would survive on my watch. The wife (I call her 'Babe' - you've seen the film) looked at me with disdain. "What are you doing?" She enquired. "Chasing daddy long-legs,” I retorted. "Oh! Have you caught any?" She asked. "Yep, three males and four females,” I replied. Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell them apart?" " Three were on a whisky bottle, four were on the phone."