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Saturday 25 June 2011

The Great Mysteries of Golf...

"Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more   about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across a desk."    Grantland Rice

"If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is."
Horace G. Hutchinson

"Man blames fate for other accidents but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one."

Author Unknown

"It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling."
Mark Twain

"Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them."
Jimmy DeMaret

"May thy ball lie in green pastures - and not in still waters."
Author Unknown

"The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.
George Deukmejian

"It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place  the world is when one is playing golf. "
Robert Lynd

"They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that."
Gardner Dickinson

"If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork  the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death."
Sam Snead

"Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness."
William Wordsworth

"If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt."
Dean Martin

"I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced."
Author Unknown

"My handicap? Woods and irons."
Chris Codiroli

"I'm hitting the woods just great - but having a terrible time getting out of them! "
Author Unknown

"The only time my prayers are never answered  is on the golf course."
Billy Graham

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
Jack Lemmon

If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle.
Author Unknown

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.
Author Unknown

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