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Wednesday, 14 February 2018

A Valentines Day Poem....

THANKYOU for the flowers, she said,
as she slowly raised her head,
I'm sorry for the things I said last night,
I was wrong, and you were right,
So I forgave her, there and then,
and as we whiled away the hours,
I thought to myself, WHAT F***ING FLOWERS!!

Barmy Albert was in the Pit Bull & Stanley Knife Pubic House, up Scropton St, with Non-Stick Nora on Valentines night and he whispered: "I love you". She replied; "Is that you or the beer talking?"
He sez, "It's me talking to the beer...".

With it being Valentines Day today, I've just said those three little words to the missus. "I'm off out..."

For Valentines Day, I've found summat that the missus looks really good in. The f***ing distance!

I sez to the missus in bed this morning, "It's Valentines Day, do that thing that you do with your mouth." She sez, "Ooooh, what do you mean?" I sez, "Shut the f**ck up."

The moment you realise your wholemeal loaf has a Valentines Day date and you haven't....

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