As she was 'flying' down the road, Non-Stick Nora passed under a bridge only to find a copper with a radar gun on the other side lying in-wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, 'Where's the fire?'
To which Nora replied, 'I'm late for work.'
'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'
' I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.
The cop stammered,'Pardon? A rectum stretcher? And just what exactly does a rectum stretcher do?'
'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide.'
'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot arsehole?', he asked.
'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..'
Traffic Ticket £95.00
Court Costs £45.00
Look on the Cop's face............ Priceless
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